Parenting the Poet: a “How-To” Guide!
By Julie Hartley
The parent on the end of the telephone was clearly unsure which way to turn. “My first three kids loved hockey, gymnastics and dance,” she told me. “I knew how to encourage them - where to find classes, and how to help them meet others with the same interests. But my youngest daughter - she wants to be a writer. How do I find a way to help her? Idon’t want her to spend her childhood locked away in her bedroom, hammering away on her computer, and never seeing her hard work amount to anything.”
Most childhood interests are easy to cater to, but for the parents of children interested in creative writing, it’s a different story. Writing is, by its very nature, an introspective activity. As parents, we want our children to develop social skills, mix with others who share their interests, and learn how to become better at the thing they love, so they can experience success and an increase in self esteem. All relatively easy with the child who loves hockey - but what about writing? How do you encourage the would-be writer in the family, especially when their interest may be very different from those of other family members?
Finding a positive role model for your child is an important first step. Speak with her English teacher. Call the literature or creative writing department in your local college or university. Find out if you have any published writers living in your community. Inquire at high schools: do they have an older student with writing interests who may be a good role model for your child? Enabling your child to see that his or her interest is not that unusual, and can lead to great things, is vital to a sense of self worth.
Allow your child time to write... but look for ways to bring her out of seclusion, too! Encourage research that may mean a visit to the library or the museum. Ask him to read his work at family gatherings, and ensure other family members respond respectfully. If this seems indulgent, consider that there is little difference between the excitement one child experiences in a hockey game with their uncles, and the thrill another may gain from sharing her poetry. Encourage your local library - or your child’s school - to set up a club for young writers. There are more of them out there than most of us think... and all children benefit from opportunities to write, especially when the task doesn’t resemble homework!
Explore web resources, and websites that may publish work by young writers. Getting their work in print may be all but impossible, but there are plenty of ways to launch a ‘writing career’ on the web! Remember to educate your child about on-line safety, and surf alongside them. Check out www.kidsonthenet.org.net, one site that publishes writing by young people. Also, visit www.stonesoup.com - their magazine would make a terrific gift for any young writer aged 8-13. Finally, help them to make chapbooks of their work, to distribute amongst friends and relatives. And ensure you read what your child is writing, and discuss it with them. Parental support is always essential, particularly if the child knows poetry isn’t usually your ‘thing’.
Summer programs exist in many communities these days,
specifically for young writers. Check out your local colleges
and universities. If nothing exists locally, consider Centauri
Summer Arts Camp (www.centauriartscamp.com), a sleep-over camp
program in the Niagara Region of Ontario, which offers
specialist writing programs in poetry, playwriting and fiction
for ages 8-18. A residential writing program may satisfy the
needs of both parent and child. He gets to write for several
hours a day, under the tutelage of professional writers. You get
the satisfaction of knowing that he’s interacting with others,
meeting great role models, expanding his horizons, and making
friends with like-minded folks.
All too often, parents of avid young writers are apt to respond with concern. They worry their child may become introverted, socially inept, and investing in an interest that can bring disappointment and rejection. These judgments may be too hasty - and even damaging to your child. A passion for writing feeds a passion for reading, and both these pursuits help develop vocabulary and improve the chances of academic success. Furthermore, a child who loves to write, is almost always a child who is strongly an individual, with a critical interest in the world around them, and plenty to say about it - qualities we should all want to celebrate and encourage. Great thinkers, strong leaders and high achievers are always people who dare to be different.
By Julie Hartley
Julie Hartley is one of the directors of Centauri Summer Arts Camp (www.centauriartscamp.com). Centauri is an overnight camp in the Niagara Region of Ontario, offering intensive arts training in 40 different arts specialties for youth aged 9-18. For permission to use this article in part or whole, please contact Julie at julie@centauriartscamp.com
January 2009